How to Create a Healthy Relationship with Money, Part 2
In my last post, I wrote about the first two steps involved in creating a healthy relationship with money:
· Step 1: Recognizing your beliefs
· Step 2: Getting to the root of your fears around money
In this post, we’ll focus on the third and fourth steps in developing a healthy relationship with money:
· Step 3: Creating a money goal
· Step 4: Making a plan
Step 3: Create a Money Goal
Once you’ve figured out your beliefs and fears around money, where do you go from there?
When I’m working with clients who’ve gotten to this point, I like to ask these questions:
Which parts of your family’s relationship with money do you want to hold onto? What would you change or let go of? In other words, how do you want to relate to money now?
When it comes to money, what do you want?
And finally, why do you want it?
All these questions are designed to help you come up with a money goal.
But not just any money goal: You want your money goal to be more than a number.
If you actually want to reach your money goal—and feel happy and fulfilled along the way—the key is to set a money goal that’s rooted in your true self.
And how do you do that?
First, ask yourself what you want to do with the money you make. What would be exciting to you? Taking a trip to Costa Rica? Owning a house? Signing up for yoga classes at your favorite studio? Being able to take your friends to dinner?
Once you connect to the things/experiences that are exciting to you, try to identify the feelings you associate with them. Would going to Costa Rica make you feel adventurous? Would owning a house make you feel empowered? Secure? Successful?
Or is your money goal more about filling a void, or living up to other people’s expectations?
When you’re setting a money goal, the key is to find one that makes you feel inspired at your core. As I tell my clients, you want to tie your money goal to things that fulfill you at the soul level.
When you make this soul-level connection, it’s easier to stay focused on your financial aspirations, even when things get challenging.
Step 4: Make a Plan
Once you arrive at your money goal, the next step is to make a plan for reaching it.
In other words, you want to create a budget. Yes—a budget!
I realize the idea of a budget can sound intimidating. Or stifling.
It might seem like a contradiction, but here’s the truth: having a clear picture of your income and expenses gives you the freedom to think about what you want in your life.
When you see your budget on paper, it’s easy to figure out how much more you need to make to reach your financial goals. (If you need help creating a budget or tracking your spending, check out free apps like Mint or PocketGuard.)
In the meantime, seek out financial role models. Is there someone in your life whose relationship with money you admire? Invite them for a chat and ask them about their path to financial success. How did they get there? What did they learn along the way? What would they change if they had to do it all over again?
The more you connect with people who embody what you want to accomplish, the more you can see that it’s possible for you, too.
Do you want to learn more about how to have a healthy relationship with money? In my new book, Life Launch, I give you additional guidance on how to assess your current relationship with money—and how to transform your finances into a tool to build the life you want. Download a sample chapter here.